For older children, it’s important to validate their feelings about how unfair this whole situation is says Amy Lopez, a licensed clinical social worker at the Johnson Depression Center at the University of Colorado Anschutz Medical Campus. “The pandemic has brought a lot of loss for teenagers. They maybe missed out on prom or football games—parents should treat those as losses and let their children grieve a bit.”

Lopez says what teenagers miss the most is hanging out with their friends, so this is not the time to put strict limits on gaming or screen time since that may be the only way they can connect. Teens should be encouraged to find new ways to use technology such as Zoom trivia games or watching online movies live together.

“Having fun is really important. Fun is where we build resiliency. It gives us a break from the stress of the pandemic.” She encourages parents to get their teens to play board games with them, take an online Zumba class together, or go to the Dairy Queen drive-through. Things that perhaps no teen would be caught dead doing with their parents before the pandemic now can be an appealing diversion.

Parents should lower expectations about the holidays but involve their teens in deciding how they can still make the season meaningful. Families can still undertake volunteer activities together as long as Covid-19 precautions are observed. She suggests adopting a family in need, making gift bags for residents in nursing homes, or assembling care packages for healthcare workers or teachers.

Both Lopez and Averch say parents can find additional online resources at websites for the Colorado Depression Center, the Mayo Clinic, and the CDC. If a child is experiencing severe anxiety, contact mental health experts.